The New Year is here and resolutions have been made. Change is on the horizon. We’re on the cusp of a new reality – woo! hoo! Sounds exciting and rewarding, right? Wrong. At least it will be wrong for most people. Only about eight percent of resolutions made will ever be realized. While that’s sad, it’s not unexpected. Most people put more thought into deciding what kind of pizza to order than they do in setting resolutions. So, if you are serious about creating change this year, here’s what you need to know…..
Three critical elements for are needed for making resolutions that stick. The first is true desire – you must have an authentic, obstacles-be-damned, lusting ambition to make your resolution a reality. It cannot be something you think you ‘should’ do. And it can’t be something someone else wants you do – it must be something you truly want. Yes – you! Not your husband, not your wife, and definitely not your mother. Resolutions made to please other people mean you’re in for a big ‘ole heaping portion of resentment! With a side of failure to boot. This is no time for people pleasing – resolutions are for you. They might benefit those around you, but they’ve got to be yours to start.
Once you’ve figured out what you want, you need to define why you want to make it happen – again this must why YOU want it to happen, not why you think you ‘should’ want it happen ( I loathe ‘shoulds’ – they just suck the joy out of life). There is a fine but very important distinction here. You need to be crystal clear on what your motivation really is.
Let me explain this a bit – let’s suppose you are one of the many people who have decided you’ll resolve to workout more often. Why do you want to do that? Lots of people are going to say it’s for health reasons. And for some of them that may be true. But for a lot of people being healthy is just not going to cut it as a primary motivating factor. For a lot of people, looking good is what they really want. They want to feel sexy, fit into skinny jeans, or rock a a little black dress at their college reunion. Despite the fact that we are a looks obsessed society (ugh), most people aren’t going to fess up to wanting to look good, because they feel it would too vain to admit that’s why they’re going hit the gym. And that means they never get in touch with their real motivation, which is a huge mistake. Be honest with yourself about why you want to make your resolution a reality and you’ll exponentially increase your chance of success.
If you are going to be one of the eight percent who are successful in achieving your resolutions you must get crystal clear on your why. Because when the going gets tough, it’s your why that will motivate you. If your why isn’t absolutely compelling you’ll be out of luck, so dig down and get clear on why you want you want you want. This is no time for bs-ing yourself (truth: there is never a time for that).
FYI – The easiest way to gain clarity is by creating a vision statement – it’s easy to do, it’s fun and you wind up with an incredibly powerful tool. If you need help with this feel free to be in touch. I’ll send you a how-to.
I said there were three critical elements – we’ve covered two – the what and the why. The third critical element is the plan. Yup – you need a plan. Without a plan you’re going nowhere fast. A plan is your map – it will guide you to success. After all, you’re going to place a you’ve never been, so directions are going to a big deal. Without them the journey is going to be a toughie. Here’s a quick guide to get you in a planning mindset: Five Steps To Reach Your Goals.
Let’s make 2014 one to remember! And if you feel like you might want a little more guidance – check out the Less Stress, More Joy – Create a Life You Love Workshop - it’s an expert guided online workshop that will help you clarify your goals and reach them quicker than you ever imagined, plus you’ll learn how to clear the clutter and create room for what truly matters.
The paperless society has yet to become a reality, so managing the inflow of paper is something we all have in common. Dealing with paper is a stressful issue for most people. Each piece of paper necessitates a decision. If you feel at all unsure, you might choose to delay making decisions. It’s a common coping mechanism. Saying ‘I will get to it tomorrow’ might bring relief for the moment, but soon that tactic backfires. Before long you will find yourself inundated by piles of paper. The whole idea of paper organization may seem as far fetched as pigs flying.
Paper clutter creates a real unease. Have you missed something critical? Is a bill going unpaid? Have you offended someone because you didn’t RSVP? So many things could be lurking in your piles.
The truth is you are only a system away from organizing and managing all that paper with ease. Using the right system will make you the master of all the paper that enters your space. Ready to get started?
Step 1: Dedicate a place to corral all incoming paper. A single collection point means you won’t need to wander around looking for stray paper. All paper, no matter the source, should land here. Choose a location that is convenient and feels natural. Ideally you should be able to easily access it even if you hands are full. Work with any habit you already have in place. For example, if papers normally land on the kitchen counter, you may want choose to dedicate a section to paper. Once you’ve chosen a location, add a container. The container is important in that it will contain your papers so they remain in one place. I know that sounds ridiculously elementary, but containerizing stops paper from the unwelcome spreading and overtaking of surfaces.
Step 2: Get acquainted with the the four possible decisions. In the broadest sense, there are only four choices for any piece of paper that enters your space. You will:
- Release it:You don’t need it, so you recycle or shred. It doesn’t belong to you, so you pass it on.
- Act on it: It requires some action on your part. Falling into this category are things you need to pay (bills), read (HOA newsletter), use (coupons), respond to (invitations) or think on (summer camp brochure).
- Reference it: These papers don’t require action, but they have information you will want to refer to in the future. Types of things that fall into this category might be sports schedules, school handbooks, manuals, takeout menus, phone lists, and so on.
- Archive it: These are things that you will you will not need to reference regularly, if at all, but must be kept for legal, financial or historical reasons. Things that fall into this category might be tax returns, tax receipts, loan documents, home improvement records, property deeds, birth certificates, and so on.
Step 3: Decide how you will house the three categories of keepers. What is your paper personality? Do you like to see things on display? Do your prefer to have paperwork hidden behind doors? Or maybe something in between? Are you a natural piler (piles are not necessarily bad, it’s how they are managed, or more aptly mismanaged, that can cause problems) or more of a filer?
The is no ‘right’ way to house paper. It needs to work for YOU, so let go of any ‘shoulds’ and start thinking about what would feel comfortable. This really is a critical step. If you choose a method that feels counter intuitive it’s highly unlikely that you will use it for very long, if at all. Remember, while file folders are very useful, they are not the only the only way to store paper. Don’t feel that you have to take a traditional route. You are free to get creative.
Online Workshop Alert: If you are ready to end paper clutter and get your papers organized for good, the Paper Organization Online Workshop is for you. The Paper Organization Online Workshop takes you through the entire process of organizing and managing paper efficiently and effectively. Imagine no more paper clutter, no more paper related stress. Imagine always being able to find what you need when you need it. How great would that be?! The Paper Organization Online Workshop will make it a reality. Guaranteed. The workshop offers a no risk sign up, so you have nothing to lose (except stress) and everything to gain.
In Part 2, I will let you in on why you don’t need to keep nearly as much as you think you do. Get ready to be empowered to discard with confidence!
In the meantime start corralling your paper. If are you wondering about storage options or anything else surrounding the issue of paper management, leave your question in the comment section, or drop me a line here. I will respond to all inquiries. If you have a system that works well, please share your tips!
Clutter, silently it creeps into our lives little by little overtaking every horizontal surface. Soon we are completely inundated by it. It takes some conscious effort to control clutter.
Feeling overwhelmed by clutter is natural. We want it gone and we want it gone now! Clutter keeps us from performing our work duties with ease, stops us from truly enjoying our leisure time and costs us financially every single day.
Clutter doesn’t happen overnight and it won’t go away overnight. However, with a plan of action, we can get it under control and keep it that way for good. No more clutter means no more frenzied searches for those very necessary but always elusive items, no more duplicate purchases, no more missed opportunities. Freedom from clutter is possible and it feels fantastic!
Follow these simple steps and you will be on your way to controlling clutter it for good.
1. Gather nine good sized boxes, bags or bins, and label them:
- Current Use,
- Memorabilia (to be properly archived)
- Return/Borrowed (to be given back to rightful owner, or moved to a more appropriate location)
- Seasonal (to be stored elsewhere)
- Six Month Test
2. Decide how long you will work. A few hours is ideal, longer than fours hours and you risk losing focus and energy. But don’t let lack of time be your excuse for letting clutter pile up. You can accomplish a lot in blocks of fifteen minutes. Set a timer; knowing that you will stop at a preset point will alleviate the angst of getting started. Most CD’s play for about an hour, so they are a good choice when you can dedicate that much time. Listening to something enjoyable can take the edge off the “ugh factor” that is often associated with decluttering. Consider treating yourself to something you really enjoy listening to and reserve it just for your work sessions.
3. Choose a focus area. Ask yourself where you spend the most time looking for misplaced items, or which area causes you the most stress. Maybe it’s the clutter in your kitchen or perhaps your bedroom is the place where your de-cluttering efforts would have the greatest impact. Choosing an area such as this to start in will give you an immediate and appreciable return on your efforts. Pick a specific starting spot, such as a drawer, shelf or cupboard, in your focus area.
4. Now it’s time to start sorting. Remember to completely finish one area before moving on to the next. As you take out each item ask yourself:
a. Have I used it in the last six months?
b. Do I plan to use it in the next six months? (“I might need it” doesn’t count, it must be a real plan)
c. Do I really love it? (Would you buy it again?)
d. Does it have serious sentimental value? (Serious means you would be genuinely upset at its loss)
If you can’t answer a resounding yes to at least one of these questions, then the item needs to leave your space. Donate, toss or recycle it. If you are really in doubt, place it in the six month test box. This box will be stashed away for six months. If at the end of the six months you haven’t needed the items or can’t remember what’s in the box you need to let it go. All other items should go into the appropriate category (see Step1), and be dealt with accordingly. The only exception to this process are the items that you must keep for legal purposes.
5. As you fill each box, take action with it. For example, if the donate box is full take it to your car and schedule time to drop it off (intentions that aren’t scheduled rarely get done). It takes effort to keep on track, but it’s well worth it.
6. As you put away your Current Use items, make sure you are placing them in the appropriate area. It’s counter productive to put something away in a spot that doesn’t make sense. Just because it came off a shelf or out of a particular drawer doesn’t mean it should go back there. Ask yourself where and how you use the item. Make it accessible for those scenarios. It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but you. If you always write letters in the living room, put your writing supplies in the living room. If you clip coupons in bed, put scissors in your night stand. Whatever you do, make it intuitive to you. If your child likes big bubbles in the bath every night and you’ve resorted to using the egg beater to make that happen, put the egg beater in the bathroom. Buy a second one for the kitchen if it’s something you regularly use, if not, don’t feel obligated to replace it. Things you have and don’t use are clutter.
7. Put everything back in its home after you use it. If you have made your items easily retrievable, you have also made them easily returnable by default. There is joy to be had in using something, and putting it away properly. Knowing that you are on the path to long term organization will bring a great deal of satisfaction to your life.
Soon you will be able to relax and enjoy the calm that freedom from clutter and disorganization brings!
Need some help decluttering? Be sure to check out Clutter Control 101. It’s an online workshop that will take you through the entire process of controlling clutter.
The easiest way to jump start the clutter clearing process is by harvesting the low hanging fruit first. We all have low hanging fruit, it’s the stuff that’s obviously past its useful life - the stuff that’s broken, old, outdated or no longer used.
Start your harvest by taking a walk through your house and toss/recycle whatever is obviously rubbish. You might think I am being presumptuous in assuming you have some garbage and/or junk lying around. But based on my experience almost everyone does (including yours truly – a couple of empty boxes have been hanging in my office for days, last months New Yorkers still linger in the magazine basket, I could go on, but you get it, we all have some low hanging fruit and I must go on a harvest as soon as I’m done posting this!).
Low hanging fruit is even more likely to exist when you have excess clutter, because junk easily blends into the cluttered landscape. Now let me be clear here, I am not suggesting anyone would purposely toss garbage around their home. I mean things like the broken beyond repair umbrella that’s been sitting in the hall closet forever, the remote that powers nothing since you upgraded to the universal gadget, last week’s newspapers, the sneakers your dog chewed just enough so that are no longer wearable. You should be able to dispose of these things with ease since it’s highly unlikely they will hold any real emotional attachment. So, what are you waiting for? Go on a harvest right now!
Have you ever been so overwhelmed by something that you can hardly see the forest for the trees? That burdened feeling makes you think you will never get through whatever you are dealing with. It may be a huge project at work, the kind that will make or break your career. It may be getting through a family crisis, the type where you can’t check out, not even for a moment . Or it might just be getting through an afternoon with sick kids - did I just hear someone scream mommmyyyy?
When you get to that place – the seriously overwrought, OMG I have so much to do I can hardly stand it, help me now place – remember this, you don’t have to figure it all out right this minute. You only have to identify the next action you need to take. That’s it. Don’t think about the end game. Don’t think about how much more you have to do. Just think about the very next step that you need to take related to whatever you’re working on or dealing with at that moment. Identify that single action and take it. Then repeat as needed. How simple is that? Incredibly.
Now to be clear, I am not saying this is necessarily easy, you actually have to take the action and continue taking action. But that’s exactly the reason this technique works. When you are involved in taking action, you are focusing on the action. This does two things – it interrupts the overwhelming thoughts (science shows us we really can’t be thinking about two things at once, so if you are focused on a task you have to stop, at least momentarily, thinking about your predicament) and it produces tangible results (you have something to show for your actions).
This is the complete opposite of big picture thinking. Here you are narrowing your focus so you can avoid the distraction that comes from a to-do list a mile long and all the siren calls for attention. You aren’t avoiding life though. You are just helping yourself move forward in a deliberate way. Sometimes blinders are necessary. When overwhelm sets in they can come on very handy. Why do you think horses wear them? So they don’t get distracted and scared. If that were to happen they would immediately go off course, losing their way and wind up in deep trouble.
I see this technique as a tricky little way to keep making progress even when I am feeling that I will never get it all done. By narrowing my focus to the present, I can avoid the crazy making that comes from being overwhelmed. Try it yourself the next time you feel paralyzed by all the things on your plate. I can practically guarantee you will feel better and see progress.
Clutter Quick Tip
We all have some clutter in our lives – it may be in our physical space, our head or our heart. What’s one thing can you let go of right now? Imagine what would happen if you just let go of one thing a day – that would be 365 things in a year!
I challenge you to say goodbye, right now, this minute, to just one thing. What’s not serving you well? What’s an irritation? What have you tripped over a hundred times and still not picked up? What’s hanging out that simply reminds you it was a less than stellar purchase? Let it go!
Do you know what it’s like to have just what you love, need and use? It’s balance, it’s simplicity, it’s elegance. Strive for that and you won’t regret it!
Here’s a question to ponder….how is clutter keeping you stuck? Have you ever wished for a little more energy or a little less stress? If anyone says no, I’m going to have question whether you’re actually from this world. We all want more energy. We all want less stress. And more time to do the things we WANT to do would pretty terrific too, right?
A little while back I wrote about reclaiming time and energy. Guess what the secret was? Clear the clutter and get rid of the excess stuff! Read about it here, and let me know how you think clutter and excess stuff blocks us.
If you haven’t signed up for the free ESCAPE Clutter E-Course, you can do so here. It walks you through the clutter clearing process in six simple steps!
Do you have goals you have yet to get started on? I know I do – some are big and lofty, some just seem big. That’s why I am embracing the Japanese Kaizen philosophy of slow, continuous improvement. I certainly espouse the virtues of the philosophy to my organizing and time management clients, so I am taking my own advice. Couple Kaizen with eating your elephant one bite at a time and you have the perfect recipe for overcoming the negative inertia that keeps us from moving forward. That is, break your goals into bite sized chunks, be consistent in applying effort, evaluate progress, make changes if needed, and be prepared to see your goals achieved.
Here in the northeast fall is fast approaching and somehow that feels like a good time for setting new goals. Spring has that effect on me too. It’s really about the transitioning of the seasons, they’re a natural time to reassess what’s working well and what’s not. How can we be serving ourselves, our families and our communities better? How can we live everyday a little more authentically and spend more time focusing on the things that really matter? These questions are loaded, no doubt about that, but if we ask them with open minds and open hearts the answers are practically guaranteed be profound.
I believe we all deserve to live well, to really, truly enjoy our lives. And it doesn’t take buckets of money. You don’t have to wait until your next big promotion, meet your ideal partner or find the perfect house. Stop obsessing about what you don’t have (yet), focus on what you do and make the most of it. Notice the parenthetical yet. It’s there because I am not suggesting that you give up on having what you desire. You should have what you want, but if you’re focused on what you don’t have, you probably aren’t making any headway toward realizing your goals.
What I suggest is that you take a look at your life and pick one area you would like to feel better about. Maybe you want more work/life balance. Perhaps you just want to share more family dinners. Or maybe you have a big dream, one you have yet to take action on, like starting a business or running a marathon. Whatever your issue, it’s time to eat the elephant.
Big goals can be overwhelming. Worrying about how we will ever reach them can be paralyzing. But if we break goals down into little bites we can see that each piece is very manageable and the overwhelm should naturally dissipate. In breaking goals down we also gain clarity – it’s easy to identify what the next action needs to be.
Are you ready to embrace Kaizen living? Use the Goal Setting Worksheet to break your overall goal down into bite sized pieces and start eating your elephant!
Little bites on a daily basis will take you places you can only imagine in this moment, but before long what you imagined will be your new reality. As least it will be if you dare to take the first bite!
Clutter – ugh! It tends to accumulate with the greatest of ease. Getting rid of though is an entirely different story. Eradicating clutter can seem like a monumental task. What gives? We’ll let bunches of stuff into our spaces without giving anything much thought, so one would think we could let go of stuff without over-thinking the decision to say goodbye, right? On the face of it yes, letting go should be easy. And it would be if emotion didn’t play a role. Those damned emotions, they get us every time! Damned or not, it’s the truth, emotions really do complicate the clutter clearing process.
Guilt is the emotion that tops the list. I feel guilty getting rid of it – as a clutter coach that’s the reason I hear most often for hanging on to the things that no longer serve a purpose. The cause of the guilt runs the gamut. Everything from ‘I paid good money for it’ to ‘Aunt Emma would never forgive me if I donated that’. Never mind that the item ‘good money’ was paid for is never, ever used. Never mind that Aunt Emma hasn’t been around for the last twenty years. In the end it’s emotion, not rational thought that rules the decision making process.
The big question then is this – how do you overcome the power of emotion when it comes to decluttering? I say let’s not try to overcome it, instead let’s use it to our advantage. It’s not difficult to do, we just need to gently redirect our focus. Think about a gem, it has many facets, so too does any problem. If the way you are thinking about an issue isn’t helping you find a solution, adjust the way you are viewing it. Look at it from a different angle.
Let’s suppose you do have clutter, and let’s also suppose, for whatever reason, you are feeling guilty about letting go of the objects you no longer use. How can you refocus the guilt so it serves you well? I’m not crazy talking, you can actually take a bad feeling and turn it into a good feeling.
Contemplate this: What if someone had something you needed. They could easily give it or sell it to you, but they choose not to. They never use it themselves, they don’t need it and they don’t love it. They just hold it, never giving anyone else an opportunity to enjoy it. What would you think of a person like this? Personally, I would think they were very poor stewards of their possessions. I would also say they are self serving and selfish.
Cold, hard truth – if we hold onto something that we don’t need, don’t use or don’t love, we are withholding that object from someone who does need it, could use it, and/or would love it. And that’s not nice. Conversely, when we release the things we no longer have use for, we are doing good, we are improving lives – our life and the lives of those who will benefit from our giving. Can you see how refocusing can turn guilt in a motivator to do good? Wouldn’t you rather be seen as generous and kind than cleaving and self-interested?
If you are unsure this can work for you, try it, there’s nothing to lose – except loads of clutter!
If you are ready to jump start the clutter clearing process you’ll want to explore Clutter Control 101 – it’s online workshop that comes with one-on-one tele-coaching – and it’s guaranteed to help you declutter your life. If you are ready to be clutter free this is the workshop for you!
You can also get free decluttering and organizing tips here.
They want more time.
And almost universally they want more energy to go with that time. We try all kinds of tactics to make both of those desires part of our reality. We over-plan and over-schedule ourselves. We multitask to the max. Then we dose ourselves with caffeine until we get so jittery we can no longer concentrate on even the simplest task. We read the latest and greatest time management books hoping we will find the perfect solution somewhere in the pages. We trick ourselves into believing that sleep is a luxury we can afford do without.
Guess what? There is an easier way to add minutes to your day and get an energy bump to boot.
Are you ready? It’s so simple it’s going to blow your mind.
Get rid of stuff.
What’s that you say – Get rid of stuff?! But I love my stuff.
I can hear that sentiment being echoed loud and clear. But here is the real deal, you do have stuff you love and that’s as it should be. However, you also have stuff you don’t love – stuff that doesn’t serve you well, adds no value to your life and doesn’t contribute to you reaching your goals. That’s the stuff you should get rid of. We call that stuff clutter. Clutter can be big or clutter can be small. Clutter is anything that doesn’t provide support to us. Clutter should not be in our space. I would be willing to bet there is a significant amount of clutter in your space.
You might wonder why I would bet on something sight unseen. Well my experience in these matters is quite broad. I have yet to work with a client who didn’t have loads of stuff that could be let go of without any negative consequences. We acquire things in such a variety of ways that it is virtually impossible to ask ourselves the important questions before we become the steward of each and every item. (If you are unsure what the important questions are drop me a lineand I will get them off to you. Or you can check out this post on controlling clutter for good.)
So let’s get back to my suggestion. Get rid of stuff. Why am I am saying this? Because, by its very nature, stuff demands our time and energy. Specifically how this works is quite simple. Stuff takes up space. A cluttered space leads to a cluttered mind. A cluttered mind leads to stress. Stress takes energy. The energy it takes is nonproductive. Do you really want to spend any of your time being nonproductive? I doubt it, especially since the goal is to free up more time.
Seeing things you no longer love or things that conjure up guilt is just as bad. Looking at things that create less than desirable feelings is not healthy. It just leads to more stress and wastes more energy.
Stuff also costs energy and time more directly. Time to put away and time to care for. When you have too many things you have to work around them in some capacity and that causes time to be wasted.
I would challenge you to let go of five things over the next five days. See how it feels to free yourself from a little bit of energy sapping, time stealing clutter.
If you are ready to jump start the clutter clearing process be sure to check out Clutter Control 101 – it’s an online workshop that will take you through the decluttering process and start you on the path to organized living.